D Day, Part Two

*** JUST A HEAD'S UP THAT THIS WILL BE THE LAST BLOG POST THAT WILL BE LINKED TO FACEBOOK.  WE HAVE TO BE CAREFUL ABOUT PUTTING TOO MUCH INFORMATION ABOUT D ONLINE UNTIL THE ADOPTION IS OFFICIALLY COMPLETE.  THE LATVIAN GOVERNMENT IS QUITE PARTICULAR ABOUT IT, SO WE'D RATHER NOT UPSET THEM.  THE BLOG WILL STILL BE UPDATED REGULARLY, JUST NOT SHARED ON FACEBOOK.  TO BE NOTIFIED OF THE LATEST BLOG POSTS, YOU CAN SIGN UP FOR EMAIL ALERTS IN THE BAR TO THE RIGHT.  THANKS!***

We last left off in D's room, minutes after our first meeting.  We had about 20 minutes alone, just the three of us, looking at pictures and him showing us his things.  His room was very neat and his bed was made perfectly.  I wondered how many times he had rearranged his things as we were meeting with the director for the hour before.  He was still very teary but had stopped crying.  Fans and I just kept talking, he probably didn't understand much but we were trying to make him feel as comfortable as possible.  We took our first pictures together.  

He has a great smile.

They called us into the other room for lunch.  They had prepared a meal for the three of us along with Dace and Inta, one of the caregivers that has worked with D for the last few years.  It was so sweet.  As we walked up to the table, D pulled my chair out for me.  The second we sat down, D started in on his cabbage soup. He ate really fast and as soon as he finished the soup, he jumped up to carry his bowl to the kitchen then sat back down and started in on his plate of chicken and potatoes.  I think I had barely picked up my spoon at that point.  I thought to myself, "Whoa, kid can eat…we are going to need a bigger fridge."  Then Dace and Inta started looking at each other and saying something in Latvian.  They were shocked because I guess D had not eaten well in days, and suddenly his appetite was back with a vengeance.  Those nerves had settled enough to finally eat.  And eat he did.  

We asked him a few questions through Dace…What's your favorite food?  What's your favorite animal?  And we talked a bit about the orphanage with Inta.  D was done really quickly, and he took his plate to the kitchen, wiped off his area with a rag, then went over to the couch.  I could see him staring at us out of the corner of my eye as we finished.  

He was playing with a balloon, so Fans walked over and pretended to steal it.  Then I walked over and we started playing "Monkey in the Middle".  

And at that point, the ice was officially broken.  

Soon he was giggling and the bonding had begun.  I will forever credit "Monkey in the Middle" as the game that moved us from awkward to comfortable.

After a few minutes, we all went back to the table for coffee and tea and some more conversation.  Our Latvian attorney came in as well as the orphanage director.  D started to clam up a little because he knew we were all headed to the orphan court and he was really scared about it.  It is a short proceeding but a little intimidating, so they kept reassuring him that he would do fine.  He had to answer a few questions so he was anxious.

We all made our way outside and got in cars and headed to court.  It was only about 15 minutes long, but it was surprisingly formal.  When it came to the part where D had to answer, he instantly put his head down and started to cry.  There was just so much emotion wrapped up in that day, and at that point, we were still strangers.  It was still very scary for him.

But he did great, and soon we were back in the car headed back to our apartment.  The three of us were in the back seat, and not much was said.  There's always so much I want to say and questions I want to ask, but the language barrier is so hard.  He and Fans actually both fell asleep for part of the drive.  I can't explain what an emotionally draining week it has been for all three of us.

We got dropped off at our apartment, and D seemed comfortable leaving Dace which was a good sign. He loves her very much and is really close with her, so we were a little worried he would have trouble leaving her to be alone with us officially for the first time.

We got inside and showed him around.  He looked over all the toys/puzzles/games we had brought with wide eyes.  We showed him his room and his closet of new clothes.  Without us saying a word, he immediately started trying everything on.  I was like, "Ok, so…this is happening.  Alright."  I think seeing a closet of new clothes was just too much to save it until later.  He came out wearing the swim trunks, which seem to be his favorite.  Whenever we get home, he puts them on.  

He's very aquatic chic.

We spent our first night together making spaghetti dinner (he doesn't like sauce but douses his in ketchup…what the what??) then playing some basketball.  We brought one of those little over-the-door basketball hoops, which has been an absolute godsend.  Our apartment has these amazingly tall ceilings so it is perfect for basketball.

Then we watched some olympics.

He liked that he had the same jams as Fans.

After a bath and a little iPad game time, he went to bed.  He was so, so tired.  We all were.  He snored that first night and hasn't snored since.  I sat out in the living room listening and wondered if maybe he was sleeping soundly for the first time in a long time.  

Knowing he has been adopted.  

Knowing he has a family that loves him.  

Knowing he is safe.  

Or maybe he was just pooped.  Who knows.

The next morning I woke up to this.

 I don't even care that I'm bald and topless.  It's the cutest thing I have ever seen.

I've always wanted a long-torsoed family.

He told the psychiatrist at the orphanage that his dream was to go ice skating with us, so you can bet your sweet cinnamon buns that we went that very first day.

And then we stopped at Double Coffee (sort of like a Latvian Starbucks, but fancier) for hot cocoa.

There was that magical moment where he grabbed our hands for the first time as we were walking through the city.  

Fans and I looked at each other over his head and smiled.

Presh.

He loves Fans.  Just can't get enough of Fans.  I love to watch them together because you can just tell that D is absolutely starving for a dad's affection.  Most if not all of the caregivers at the orphanage are female, so you can imagine how much a little boy would crave a father figure.  If he could, D would just wrestle/play keep away/play basketball...play anything…all day long if that means he gets to be with his Dad.

It is so precious.

Fans is such a good dad to him.  So patient and affectionate.  

He is just what D needs in a father.

Today we did some more exploring, went to the Lego movie, and then out for a small bite of pizza.

 Ordering pizza in centimeters is confusing.  Dang metric system.

Kid was in pizza heaven.

It absolutely blows my mind that we have only known this child for 60 hours.  When I think about that car ride from the orphanage to the apartment, and how we still very much felt like strangers, to now, just 2 days later…so much has changed.  Just 2 days of some quality time, some routine, some miles walked, some hugs and affection, some meals shared, lots of laughs...and we have quickly become a family.

Each hour gets more comfortable.  

Each bedtime seems more normal.

Each hug feels more natural.

This bonding time is an absolute gift.  Three solid weeks with no schedules, no expectations, no job responsibilities, no pressure.  Just time to become a family.

Knowing how good we feel 60 hours in, I can't wait to see how we are at the end.

I know it's not all fairy tales and butterflies and glitter glue...that there are big mountains ahead and pain to be shared and healing to begin.

But for now, it all feels like a fairy tale.

The family I have wished for deep down in my heart for the last 12 years is coming to life in front of my eyes.

And the tears are falling as I hear the sound of a sleeping boy in the next room.

My sleeping boy.

Thank you God.